HOW?

How do you forgive the people that consistently hurt you? Or make you feel small and worthless. Like your job doesn't matter and your thoughts don't matter. How do you get past it? Its all fine and dandy to read about forgiveness and how Christ forgave us and how we should forgive others 70x7...but the question is HOW? Did Jesus feel this BITTERNESS of people rejecting him? Did he WANT to forgive them? Where do you find that? How do you even get to the point that you want to let it go? How do you get there when you know that things will never change and you will always be an outsider? What about my feelings? Why do I have to be the one who has to turn the other cheek? WHY AM I THIS WAY? Sometimes I feel so rejected and alone. I guess it is probably how Jesus felt. Even his 12 didn't understand what His purpose was. Why can't I take solace in that? I feel so alone sometimes. I'm sitting there with 20 different people and I am just alone. I don't know what to say. I can't get past the hurt I feel. I need to get past this but I dont even know where to start.